“New sex, new woman.

Nobody who is having great sex with her partner suddenly divorces. In my case, my mate and I shared a bed for years after we shared intimacies. When we divorced, I had been with only one man
for thirty years and the prospect of being with a new partner, let alone finding one, was terrifying to me. I was in my fifties, had birthed four kids, gone through menopause and found my first gray pubic hair by the time we parted. Not only that, but my self-confidence had been obliterated. Not his fault, really; rather I’d long ago stopped thinking of myself as anyone other than part of a duo. Who knew what I liked or wanted anymore? I hadn’t asked myself that question in a quarter of a century.

I had no idea that the prize for surviving divorce and finding the right new partner was the delirious, mind-bending and unexpected joy of New Sex! The kind of sex where kissing is sustained and urgent. Where feeling a hand move up my back to release my bra is unbearably erotic and the feeling of new hands touching me fills me with anticipation and wonder. This just isn’t talked about enough in divorce conversations.”

—Vicki Iovine Model, Writer, Lawyer

 

You and your more-than-likely-neglected vagina are about to go out and meet the world for the first time in years. Whether you’re reeling from your divorce or doing cartwheels out of your lawyer’s office, it’s a major transition time on many fronts: emotional, psychological, financial. But nothing causes more anxiety (or anticipation) than the prospect of taking your vagina out for a spin after the abandonment that often accompanies the final years of an unraveling marriage. The realities of being a single, sexually active adult are very different than they were in past decades. There’s a lot to learn and, when the time is right, discuss with a new partner. The rules have changed in 2017, as have the necessary conversations that accompany the start of any kind of relationship.


Chapter Photos

Vaginal Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV)
Vaginal Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV)
Vaginal Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV)
Vaginal Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV)

Sarah, 73 years, was unaware her new partner, 15 years her junior, had HSV, nor did she think she could even get that virus!

Vaginal Tear from Sex due to menopause and infrequent use.
Vaginal Tear from Sex due to menopause and infrequent use.
Vaginal Tear from Sex due to menopause and infrequent use.
Vaginal Tear from Sex due to menopause and infrequent use.

The mature vagina might also need some additional estrogen to avoid the changes associated with low estrogen, including delicate, dry and fragile vaginal tissue, which can result in tearing, burning, and pain during sex, and allow easy access for STIs.